I felt bad when I got back my physics homework, with phrases like, ‘Good understanding’ or ‘Clearly explained’ written in red pen and random ticks in the margin. I felt bad because I had cheated.
Each week I sat in the school science lab and made some slight effort to understand what the poor man was trying to teach us. Not one word of it made sense to me. I diligently copied down the homework assignment and stared at it for a while. Nothing. Then I did what I’d always done. I went to my friend Cathy’s place and asked her older brother what I should write. He told me, in simple language, and I wrote what he said in my own words. Then I handed it in and guiltily received the accolades I did not deserve.
As soon as I could, I dropped physics classes and took no further interest in the subject until I was far older and wiser, and by then it was too late to make up all the lost ground by anything approaching conventional means.
For me to sit here now and plan to write about the cosmos and its composition – to explain dark matter, the many worlds interpretation, parallel universes and dark energy, then, would seem to be the height of stupidity. My ignorance of such matters is palpably clear. My credentials are non-existent.
Certainly I have worked my way through many a volume of what bookshops call Popular Science, but I’m not foolish enough to believe that this qualifies me to be an expert. No. I’ve cheated again. I’ve done exactly what I did over half a century ago. I’ve sought out an authority on the subject and written down their wisdom in my own words. At least this time I’m admitting it up front, though.
So, you are wondering, where would she find such an authority? Can anyone explain these things? There are theories, of course, but truth…? The greatest minds in physics are still arguing and pondering.
All that is quite true. When I was a teacher, I told my classes I was not going to teach them all they needed to know, but I was going to teach them how to find it out. I did my very best to do that, although I stopped short of teaching them my own particular method – mainly because it would have seen me instantly dismissed from the profession.
I discovered my method by what I would call ‘chance’ if I believed that anything in life is random. You may believe me or not as you wish. I shall simply set down what happened. In my next post, I’ll share the cosmology and leave you to draw your own conclusions.
At the end of the last century a dear friend of mine passed away, leaving me with instructions to watch over her little aspie son who at that time was a pupil of mine. I did my very best. The child was at times a true delight: brilliant, fascinating and eloquent. At other times he was silent, angry, sullen and secretive. And there were – especially as he reached adolescence – times when he sought to numb his pain and loss by engaging in dangerous and frightening habits.
I knew my feeble efforts weren’t enough. I needed back up.
I consider myself to be the most fortunate of individuals. I only have to put out a strong desire for assistance and the Cosmos provides. It so happened that I was experimenting with dowsing around that time. I quickly discovered that, with just the right degree of concentration tinged with an ability to relax into whatever came to me, I could pick up rudimentary messages from the child’s departed mother, from spirit guides and even from angels. The messages from the mother were easy to verify. Those from spirit less so, but I gradually came to trust them and to rely on the guidance I was given. By modifying my methods, I learned to pendulum dowse over a computer keyboard so that I could record my questions and the answers. I began to read White Eagle, Conversations with God, Seth and Jane Roberts and realised that I was doing something called channeling.
Meanwhile the child had grown into a young man with astonishing insight and an inner knowing quite as profound as the material my guides offered. When he was inclined to interact with me, he shared his knowledge freely and we experimented fearlessly with metaphysics, wrote books together and pushed the boundaries of our knowledge.
Quite suddenly though – a couple of years ago – he returned to his silent, brooding self. The conversations ceased and I all but lost touch with the extraordinary young man I’d watched over and learned from for so long. My guides and angels, too, seemed to withdraw.
As if on cue, the vacuum this left in my life was filled by a family disaster. Unexpectedly, I found myself whisked across the country to support my child and her children. For a year my focus was firmly fixed in the physical world of survival, all thoughts of cosmic wonders pushed aside. It took me the best part of another year to recover from the horrors of that time. It wasn’t until September of 2019 that I turned once again to my pendulum and sought some guidance from spirit.
I had little idea what I was searching for. I just had a few questions I wanted answers to. The answers to one deceptively simple enquiry took me on a wild and wonderful journey, deep into aspects of reality I’d barely dreamed of, although – when I looked back – that very special young man had left me a trail of breadcrumbs to follow.
So finally I’m ready to share some of my new-found discoveries here. Next time, I’ll explain the cosmology I’ve been given and after that… Who knows?
It’s good to be back.