It was a difficult choice – to be jabbed or not to be jabbed. Once I finally made my choice, there was the next obstacle; should I make my decision public?
I decided yes – to both. Many reading this will be mystified as to why it was such a difficult decision. After all, for the vast majority of people on BOTH sides of the argument, it’s a ‘no brainer’. Either they believe implicitly in the science and can’t wait to be vaccinated or they are convinced that all sorts of nasties are being injected into the arms of unwitting victims, which will have dire consequences.
I have friends on both sides of the fence. Not since the English Civil War, I would imagine, has opinion been so divided and intractable. Politely begging to differ is no longer an option. Walking down the pavement in my town, and many others, I’d imagine, 30% of the population are masked and hooded, glaring furiously at anyone passing them and veering into the path of buses to avoid close contact with a human biohazard. Another 30% jeer nastily if you step aside to let them pass and make a concerted effort to come as close as they can, ostentatiously hugging and kissing anyone they vaguely recognise. That only leaves just over a third of the population who will nod or smile in a friendly manner and go about their essential business as best they can.
The trouble with me is that I make very little effort to ‘fit in’. I ponder my decisions carefully, but doing what others do because that’s the line of least resistance has always seemed weak and rather a cop-out.
‘Aha,’ you may say. if you reside on that side of the fence, ‘So you are one of the subversives! You’re a conspiracy theorist.’ Well no, actually.
‘Aha,’ you may say, if you are from the other side, ‘So you are one of us! Not one of the sheeple. You have seen the hidden agenda!’ Also no.
I was once accused by a friend in bright felted garments and dreds of being ‘not alternative enough to fit in’. I ventured the suggestion that being ‘alternative’ seemed to me to imply not fitting in. She shook her head sadly and told me I should at least wear some beads….
Still, back to the vaccine. You see, I am not generally a huge fan of allopathic medicine. This does not stem from any deep mistrust of the medical profession. I take from them what works for me and go elsewhere if others can help more.
When my daughter was 8 or 9, she had severe stomach aches. I took her to the doctor who asked many questions, prodded her a great deal and pronounced her quite healthy. The pains continued. In desperation I then took her to a homeopath who asked many questions then gave her some tissue salts which cleared up the pains within days. It was my first encounter with homeopathy, but certainly not my last.
When I had sciatica, which was excruciating, I again went to a doctor. I gratefully accepted the physiotherapy appointment he offered but declined the painkillers and the second prescription which (he had the grace to blush) he admitted was to neutralise the side-effects from the painkillers. I used the sheet of physio exercises and found an excellent acupuncturist. Together they healed me.
For broken or dislocated bones, it’s doctors every time. For most other ailments I usually elect for some kind of complementary treatment. I’m a great believer in energy healing and it has proved very effective for all manner of problems throughout my life. It does have limitations though. I noted that whilst radionics, for example, has been amazing at sorting out everything from allergies to breathlessness to digestive problems, it was not effective with a respiratory virus that laid me low the Christmas before last. A relative had a similar issue with a viral disease. It’s as if viruses somehow get through the net of energy healing. I have only this experience as evidence, but – as I said – I make my own choices based on what works for me.
Three of my good friends have seen fit to spam me relentlessly with anti-vax propaganda. Maybe they see me as ‘one of them’, or perhaps their evangelical zeal (Oh dear, how I HATE evangelism!) induces them to send it to everyone they know. Perhaps they think they are ‘saving’ me.
I’ve read and watched some of it. Most of the posters claim to be ‘spiritual’, although the tirades of sarcasm, scepticism and arrogance which invariably follow give me some cause to doubt that assertion. I’ve never understood why spirituality seems so closely aligned with conspiracy theories. Goes back to not being alternative enough, I suppose.
Then there’s the pro-vax propaganda; burbling Prime Minister, a train of look-alike Secretaries of State and the scientists who are now media personalities in their own right – JVT with his endearing long-winded metaphors that usually get lost in the middle, Sir Patrick with his headmasterly severity, Jenny Harries with her gentle, well-modulated points and Chris Whitty with his earnest, passionate appeals.
Both sides have statistics galore. You can argue anything with statistics. So which way to jump? I finally decided to use a method of choice that would horrify the scientists and probably bemuse many of the conspiracists. I took my trusty pendulum, tuned into the part of myself the scientists would deny existed and asked it questions. Like I say, I believe in energy. I believe that my body knows at a deep, spiritual level what is right for it and although my conflicting thoughts can get in the way of decision-making, this simple method is sensitive enough to pick up my body’s truth.
‘If I have the vaccination, will it be beneficial to my body?’ Pendulum swings sideways – NO.
‘If I have the vaccination, will it be harmful to my body?’ NO.
‘If I have the vaccination, will it lessen my chances of catching Covid-19?’ Pendulum swings front to back – YES.
So the decision was made. Not beneficial per se, but effective in preventing me from catching a disease that my age, fitness levels and weight suggest could be serious.
I have lived completely alone throughout the pandemic. Not so much as a goldfish to talk to. Days on end with no human contact. I have not left this divided little town for many months. I have not seen grandchildren, children or my much-loved elderly aunt for over a year. I have missed train rides, coffee or lunch with friends, bus trips around the beautiful Somerset countryside, trips to shows and museums… I opted for the jab.
So thank you to all who have tried to help me towards my decision. Thank you to the delightful, thoughtful and efficient nurses and stewards at the vaccination centre. They gawped in amazement when I said I was not on any medication at all. “What – NOTHING?” cried the nurse, re-checking my DOB. Nope. With the medical profession, I take from them what works for me and go elsewhere if others can help more.